The square is a diamond.

It must be countless.... the number of times I have heard kids blurting out gems like these.

This one happened when my little one saw one of her scrabble game pieces simply lying on the table. She was looking at it from an angle and out came an excited "Look mummy.....the square is a diamond!" At that moment I just calmed her down with a "Yes, it is sweetie", but then I wondered where the hell had I lost this uninhibited, no-set-boundaries and no-defined-rules imaginative way of thinking. Why can't we look at our squares as diamonds?

The other day, she was trying to draw a TV on her drawing board - in circular shape of course, because she doesn't like straight lines. Anything is possible.

Logical thinking doesn't work. Lateral does. And three feet tall people are full of 'lateral'.

I recall reading an address by a renowned inventor. He was telling the children 'Don't listen to your parents and don't listen to your teachers.' His logic was - what was good at the time your parents were children isn't good enough now. Probably true.

When we were kids, I recall playing a game of words. Somebody says a word and you must immediately speak another word. The rule is, the second word must be absolutely unconnected to the first. Maybe this one should be a game for grown-ups.

Rain Rain go to Spain?

"Rain Rain go away, come again another day, little Johnny wants to play" - how many of us recited this poem at school? And how many of us recited this poem in India(!) And after reciting that poem in K.G. we grew up and learnt in 'social studies'  that India is primarily an agricultural economy. And that the farmers largely depend on rain.

This poem was probably brought into India by the Brits. At some places they have actually gone a step ahead and added another line 'Rain rain go to Spain, do not show your face again'. Notwithstanding the fact that many of them themselves actually go away to Spain to satisfy the craving for sun.

Human nature is self contradictory. We long for something "different" and when we do have it for some time, we long to go back to familiar circumstances. We had a first hand experience of this in Ireland last week. It was a full week of Sun. Seven consecutive sunny days are as rare in Ireland as a summer below 30 degrees in India - a practical impossibility. We were delirious with joy until about the fifth day. On the sixth day, fear started creeping up - 'How long is the sunshine going to last - lets make the most of it while its here.' And finally when it rained yesterday, many of us were 'Ah, thank God, it's the same old Ireland' - though I am sure there will be very few who will confess to this. It's unfashionable to love the weather in Ireland.

Our car being what it is, was resting in a garage yesterday (timing!) and I had forgotten my umbrella at home (timing again!). And yet, my Indian soul, one which had, in past, enjoyed rainy days on my apartment ('flat' for US and India) terrace, thoroughly enjoyed walking in the rain back from my daughters' creche draped in a plastic 'poncho' (google image if you don't know what it means). I must have looked silly, since the last baby in the baby room had his eyes wide open with amazement when he looked at me. But it didn't matter - the familiar rain was back and for once, I was loving it. And sitting within her rain covered buggy, so was my daughter.

It doesn't matter what the weather outside is, really. It is the weather inside that counts.

So, what's new?

That is probably the very next statement you hear, particularly on telephone conversations, after a Hi / Hello / How are you?

It just goes to show how humans, naturally, are fascinated by "new". New clothes, new films, new cuisines, new job, new relationships, new events et al.  (Remember the "Waah Sunilbaabu... naya ghar, nayi Mrs." ad?). We want to know something we don't already know - maybe that's why we keep tracking all the NEWs? (I'd ignore my information that it's actually an acronym for North East West South).

Given our attraction towards the 'new', its amazing how we can still continue to be the same, live in the same way, think in the same way - nothing new! If we were to do (read try) something new, if not every day (like our kids), atleast every week, we'd garner a wealth of experiences.

I have taken up walking in the mornings and / or at lunchtimes nowadays (need to lose weight or else might need a lot of 'new' loose clothes). Though the rain in Dublin gives me ample reasons to go back to sleep in the mornings, the last few days have had some 'new' and fresh sunshine, and below is what you get to see when you venture out at lunch times in St. Stephen's Green in Dublin on a sunny day.

It is a really refreshing walk. As for me, I can't help wanting to bring my little princess down here and sitting with her beside the duck pond. Just sitting there.

And today, since the sun is back playing hide and seek and alternating with the rain, I'm back to what I didn't do since last couple of months - blog. And that's refreshing too!

Being be-littled.

You don't get an off on Valentine's day. There's no point asking for an off, since it's busy season for hubby anyway. So you come to office, and like all moms working outside their homes, your mind wanders off (yet again) to the strongest link between you and your partner. When they are with you, you have an abnormal craving for some "lone" time. When they are not with you, the cherubic photo on your desk takes your mommy mind back to them.

So as a part of the lunchtime blogging for today, here are ten rules to being "be-littled" ( in similar sense as be-witched maybe??).

1. Bow : You must get down to the size of the "towering" three foot personality in front of you, if you want to reason with them. Being high headed is not acceptable in negotiations.

2. Mind your ears: Train your ears to hear 'What's this?' as a song. In fact, it will most often be uttered twice at the same time, and in a rhythm.

3. Mind your memory: Send your grown up memory for a brisk walk, to return after 3-4 minutes. You must forget where they were hidden a moment before and look desperately for them, at the same time saying "Oh, where's my little girl gone? Mommy cannot find her..........." Repeat this four times, ending with finding them at the same place all five times.

4. Choice: Please note that a "pretty dress" can be requested to be tried at any time, including bed time. Pyjamas don't fit the definition of "pretty dress".

5. Still life?: All objects listen. They must be waved goodbye to.

6.Language: All "Oops!" must be replaced with "Upsy Daisy!".

7. Break? What Break?: Settling down too obviously with a book is prohibited. If you do so, you deserve a summons like "Let's have a picnic." or "Lets play the ABCD."

8. Higher authority: Any raising of voice is likely to be immediately appealed to a higher court. "Daddy's comin" will be the standard wordings of the notice.

9. Never say no: Please remember that any direct refusals to comply are likely to be met with 'bawling'. Bawling is not crying. Crying is shedding tears when you are sad. Bawling is designed to make mommy and daddy feel like crying. Please do not refuse. Re-direct instead.

10. Pardon: Any requests for pardon must be accompanied with the fees of a hug. Incomplete requests are likely to be ignored.

Mommies, more rules in your rule books? Please bring them out. :)

Kuchh Khaas hai, ham sabhi mein......

Preeti's last writing prompt on the final Wishlist Wednesday on her blog justamotheroftwo.blogspot.com immediately took me back to this superb Cadbury's ad of some time ago:

Kuchh khaas hai, ham sabhi mein,
Kuchh baat hai, ham sabhi mein,
Baat hai, khaas hai, kya swaad hai..... kya swaad hai, zindagi mein.

All of us have something which other people would like to have. All of us at some or other time in our lives, become someone other people would like to be - for however short a period of time. So also, everyone around us would have some good quality, which we might like to acquire. And the good thing is, you can acquire these without depriving them of it :)

So to answer the prompt,

I wish I could be like my Mom, when it comes to not wasting even a little bit of food by efficiently using it in some or other way before it spoils. She can conjure up incredibly tasty dishes by using left over bits, before it is spoiled.

I wish I could be like my Dad, when it comes to business acumen. To bring a business from a small home office to the level it is now, he must be knowing the inside out of it.

I wish I could be like my Husband, when it comes to patience and stability in dealing with circumstances. He is a perfect example of 'If you can keep your head when all about you, are losing theirs and blaming it on you'. (Please see the poem 'If' by Rudyard Kipling)

I wish I could be like my Mother in Law, when it comes to undivided, absolute dedication towards bringing up children. The manner in which she has brought up her children, despite the family circumstances, is nothing short of exemplary.

I wish I could be like my Daughter, when it comes to curiosity. As I mentioned in a previous post, every alternate sentence of hers is 'What's that'? Wonder why we loose this childlike curiosity when we grow up?

I wish I could be like my Boss, (yes, he too has something good) when it comes to using the perfect language in a negotiation. He can make a point of what he wants, and yet not make the opposite party feel like they have lost something.

And last but not the least, I wish I could continue to be like Me, when it comes to noticing the good qualities in people who surround me :)

The un-rippling effect.

Land me into a tranquil soil,
the fertility of which, isn't affected
by the ripples caused by winds of turmoil;
And which continues to support growth, unabated.

'When you want to change (read improve) the world, you should start with yourself'. We all wish to improve something or make things better for someone around us, don't we? But have we considered that improving something within ourselves might make a remarkable improvement for the people and things around us?

I wish I could touch a level of stability such that

Acceptance or rejection,
Success or failure,
Joy or grief,
Favourable or unfavourable circumstances

do not become a ripple and affect my journey - what I had set out to do and why I had set out to do it.

I am not asking for a stony, emotionless heart. But I don't need an impulsive mind either. I am only asking for a stability enough to not react to the emotions, enough to not affect my sense of purpose, and my steps towards achieving it.

I wish I could touch a level of stability which will help me retain my cool when my toddler drives my patience to extreme limits, because I had set out to be a good mother and because I love my child dearly. Won't it result in creating a wonderful example for her?

I wish I could touch a level of stability which will allow me to continue to climb the ladders of professional space, despite rejections of all ideas and non recognition of all efforts, because I had set out to be a good employee, and because I wanted to contribute something to my work. Won't it improve processes for me and other people?

Probably the following lyrics of a hindi movie song say it all -

Gham aur khushi mein fark na mehsoos ho jahaan......main dil ko us muqaam pe laata chala gaya, har fikr ko dhunve me udaata chala gaya......

This post is in response to the Wishlist Wednesday No. 6 posted by Preeti Shenoy on her blog : http://justamotheroftwo.blogspot.com.

Some thoughts which sprouted in 2012

I needed to finish this one before the end of this month, or else it would only be too outdated!!! Just like it would have happened to everyone, 2012 did leave me with some thoughts, feelings, experiences which I had not had previously. Below is some food for thought, which sprouted in 2012....and might possibly branch out in 2013 :)

1. Something should be in the pipeline.

Unless something - some new learning, some new experience, some new project is in process, you're not really living. It might be as simple a thing as figuring out a way to get your toddler to do something, rather than doing it yourself (if you're a parent, you know that this is a project in itself) or something not-so-simple, like figuring out a way to earn more money/reduce taxes/increase savings etc. etc. But something should be in process of being learnt and perfected, something should be in the pipleline.

2. Be curious.....

About people. I know people call this intrusive, but I think its fine as long as you're not piercing someone's personal space. Example - Asking "Where did you buy this dress from?" is perfectly normal and might even be seen as a compliment by someone. "Why are you wearing this sort of dress?" is not normal and will be seen as intrusive by most.

About events. Even those that might not be directly relevant to you. "Why is there a traffic jam delaying my return home?" is not really curiosity. What are the people protesting against, resulting in creating a traffic jam is a bit of curiosity. Why are they protesting, what were the events which led to this - is another level of curiosity.

About things. Every alternate sentence of my nearly three years old daughter is "What's that?" And when answered, she tries to repeat that word twice and can recall it at the most unexpected times. If you don't know what 'gangnam style' on your friend's facebook post means, google it and find out. Google can be an incredible curiosity feeder and generator.

3. Knowing your biggest limitation - may or may not be associated with fear.

In my case, it is not being able to pass the driving test and secure a full licence. Now, I am not afraid of driving. As one of my cousins remarked years before.... "she is the most confident driver I have seen. Whether or not she's good at driving is another question."   If not observed by anyone, I tend to drive pretty well, by the book, actually. But there seems to be this "rule-bound" way of being tested here, which I don't quite seem to be getting. In fairness, I trained and got my first licence in Ahmedabad, India. If you've lived there, you know how the driving discipline there is, if there is any. Lets see if I can conquer this one in 2013.

But my story apart, it pays to know what's that one thing stopping you, limiting you, making your life difficult. If you know this, you can dream of and work towards attacking it.....and conquering it.

What were your new thoughts, experiences in 2012? Please do share.

 

It's not done till it's done. :))

This post is in response to 'Wishlist Wednesday No.4' - hosted by Preeti Shenoy on her blog justamotheroftwo.blogspot.com. The creative prompt for this week is: I wish everyone loved.....   

Now, I'm not normally interested in other people's love lives. No, not even celebrities'. As long as people don't hurt any living beings, I'm fine with whatever they love.

But there are some attitudes, which, if installed in everyone, can change the way a person, family, organisation, country or the world functions.

So to answer the prompt, I wish everyone loved to finish the work they were doing, no matter how huge or how trivial. Just think, if people started focussing on completing the work at hand, if everybody put their share of bricks and mortar in, much better things would be built in no time. Mind you, I am not promoting completion of work without quality. Quality of work is important, but at the same time, completion is equally important.

Incomplete or half-hearted work, as we call it, will leave loose ends for others to pick up. And then, they can either make a mess of what you originally set out to achieve, or they can create something brilliant, to their credit, though the foundation was yours.

Take ample time to plan out whatever is required before you start working, and once you do start working, finish it.  If there are problems or obstacles in the middle, try to find a solution and do all you can to counter the obstacles. My maths teacher taught me this. I wasn't good at maths and I would bring problems to him saying I am not able to solve them. On one occassion he remarked "Unless you complete the problem to the extent where you get stuck and can't go further, I am not going to help you."  And still, how often we get defeated just by the sight of the problem and wait for a "maths teacher" to arrive, even before approaching the problem? If we do not apply our mind at all to the problems, we are never going to solve them.

Its only natural for the caterpillar to struggle against the cocoon and finally come out to be a butterfly. Once the cocoon is created, it can't sit inside forever.

Completing something small and saying "I've done it!" can give tremendous satisfaction - the kind which can never be received from initiating something big - and then leaving it half way.